Hans and Desiree

I first met Hans a decade before meeting his wife Desiree. He had trained the coach I had hired to help me with my first women’s retreat around 2001. He led a group conversation to see if anyone was interested in doing his coaches training program. I was very interested, however the cost was a deterrent. That, and my partner at the time would definitely not be in support of my doing such a thing.

I was clear I wanted to be around this person. The way he talked about his wife was extremely complimentary and loving. Listening to his acknowledgment of her, expressed the huge difference she had made in his life. He gave her credit for who she was to him with incredible admiration and gratitude for her being his partner and mother to his son.

It was such a contrast to the way couples usually talk about their spouses. Normally you’d hear complaints and jesting over their short-comings and mistakes. 

I began hearing Desiree’s name when I began promoting my Girls Rite Of Passage programs. She too had created a self esteem course for teens. Those who knew her immediately had her come to mind as a resource and connection for me to use with the work I had begun.

It wasn’t until a dear friend invited me to a Zumba class with her that I met Desiree. She was teaching the class and her enthusiasm and light immediately drew me in. Eventually, I brought my mom to class with me and they bonded through the experience of losing their mothers. We started a deep friendship that has lasted a lifetime. And yes of course, Hans came with the deal.

I did his year long coaches training course in 2011, as a single mom raising my kids through their formative years. Little did I know that the two of them would bookend my success going forward. They rooted me on when I dated, when I started a new project, and when I needed to pick myself up after a loss. I danced and roller skated with Desiree and leaned into Hans as my coach over the years that passed. We took our kids on trips together and did weekends away with friends. They were always up for adventures and deep honest conversations, two of my favorite things. They would even interview the men I dated and offer feedback and recommendations. They were my masculine and feminine perspectives on the outside.

Our kids were around the same ages so we could bring them all together, trusting they would be entertained. We celebrated birthdays and holidays surrounded by friends and family to stir the pot of joy and love, honoring elders and supporting the next generations through their changes and challenges.

Having these two in my life is a testament to the difference that support can make. Not just any support, but conscious people to trust vulnerably. Knowing that no matter what mistakes or setbacks happen, they’d always accept and encourage me to keep going!

Now they’ve moved away and of course I miss them. I’m in a much better place than I had been through those years and my ability to adapt and stay confident in myself is something I’ve nestled into fairly well. I am no longer single and my kids have grown up, which is not to say I don’t still have challenges. However, being held by two conscious individuals, committed to joy, laughter, play, integrity, and humanity has helped me lay the foundations for what I’m up to today.

If you are looking for a conscious community and people to uplift and encourage your best, consider coming to our 3rd Annual Women’s Evolution on November 1st-3rd, 2024! The right support and being held to your best makes such a difference…